Memories
A few days later, I was at my Gr. Grandparents house, going through her things. They lived by a river, and there was water in the basement earlier this year. They were still working on cleaning things out and we needed to get it finished. We laughed and cried, memories abound in that house, they lived there for 45 years. The house abounds with memories of them.
A few Saturdays ago all the family was supposed to meet at the house, to help clean up and then divvy up possessions. There were so many things that meant something to one or the other, or all of us. It's amazing how one of the many unique toys they collected would bring back a score a happy memories.
The funny thing about all of it, was that after the fact, it got me to thinking. Thinking about all the material things that exist in a person's life. The things that, before they are a person's possession, they are meaningless. But once they become an owned possession they are important. They become priceless, and to friends and families a door to memory lane. What things do I own that will someday be a priceless treasure to someone else? Make the most of today, and treasure the memories of yesterday.
So, I had the scare of my life!!
You can almost see it starting at 3:08, it's behind the green building, a few doors down from Subway.
So, I really started freaking out, in fact, I was about ready to cry! And I was at work, so there wasn't anything I could do, and I couldn't very well burst into tears at work! I resorted to, it's o.k. everything is fine, he wouldn't leave all the instruments in the shop at the mercy of the water, I trust him, everything is fine, AHH!!!!!!!!!
Then I had an idea, maybe my violin teacher had Mr. Reck's home phone number, granted, she is hard to get ahold of, but I thought, just maybe she would be home, school was out for the summer.... thankfully she was home. And she had called Reck's yesterday to check on the stuff she had down there. Everything was safe and had been moved to his house. *breathes sigh of relief* I can't imagine life without my violin, I mean, it is my life!!! So, anyway I'm breathing again :)
I'm a physical mess!
Monday I woke up with a terrible pain in the middle of my upper back. Kinda like a pinched nerve. Mom has done the vibrator massager thing on my back twice it's a little better. But because of it, my back is tender sometimes I'm in pain and get weak so I can't lift much of anything.
I realized last night that my left arm has been falling asleep almost every night when I am relaxing at home. I'm assuming it has something to do with my back.
I woke up at 6:45 this morning because the muscle in the back of my lower left leg cramped up. I couldn't move. Steph got me the heating pad and I applied heat for about 2 hours. It's still really tight. I took calcium tablets this morning and have been eating almonds all day. I'm going to put more heat on before I go to bed. Hopefully the cramping will go away soon.
So, yeah... I think that's it. I'm going to the Chiropractor at 8:15 Saturday morning. We are hoping that will solve the back and arm problem. As for my leg, well I think I need to slow down, drink more milk and eat consistent full meals........
AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just wanted to say
Hello all!!!
Anyway, I've been thinking recently about music. And well... I reread Brock and Bodie Thoene's book Vienna Prelude a month or two ago. And well, the musicians in the book talk about music expressing the thoughts or words of your heart. That as a musician you can express what is on/in your heart through the music that you play. The music of the heart.... So anyway, I've just been thinking about that,... and wondering, what my heart says....
So....
O.K. God, I'm finally listening...
Anyway, 6 weeks later after 2 weeks of some rest over the holidays my wrist was still quite sore. So, I went to the Chiropractor. Who helped me some, but the soreness was still there. I tried playing my violin a couple times but my wrist has become weak and it is hard to play, my wrist felt like a shell of it's former self. It's difficult and discouraging to play when you can't play like you used too. So, I called my aunt who is a Physical Therapist. After asking a few questions, she said that my wrist was healing, it wasn't pain anymore, just achy sore. She gave me some exercises to do, they hurt but they should strengthen my wrist. So, for now, I wear a wrist guard/stabilizer close to 24/7. So, I try very hard to have a good attitude, and trust in God. I keep telling myself what Mom tells me, God doesn't take away a gift. The gifts and callings of God are without repentance
So, on Sunday at the end of the meeting my wrist was suddenly and unexplainably in a lot of pain, something it hadn't done in a few weeks. After the meeting the elders prayed for me and I am really trusting in God. The thing is, after the elders prayed for me, Krystina was asking me about my hand. And she asked me if I had been asking God what He was teaching me, what I was supposed to learn in this. And truthfully... I hadn't really been thinking/praying about it. The thought had come to mind, but that was about it. And the more I think about it, the more I've realized that there is definitely something I am supposed to be learning.
I was thinking about that on and off all day on Sunday. And then, when I got home, I slipped on the snow and fell. When I fell my neck connected with the open box top I was carrying. Needless to say, it hurt. I have a cardboard burn on my neck and I bruised my throat. All day Monday I was very sore and thinking. God, is definitely trying to teach me something, I've never been this "hurt" in my life. God is breaking me down and making me vulnerable. Cutting down my independency and self-sufficiency and making me dependent on Him and Him alone. It's amazing, how long it takes for me to get past my self and my "pain" and realize that God is trying to talk to me, to get through my thick brain and make me more like Him. It's amazing how long it takes till I can finally say "O.k. God, I'm finally listening."
Praise the Lord!
I've been very depressed this semester, I'm not at peace, really just miserable. I can't play very well anymore, all the confidence I had in my playing ability was gone. I don't know if this works with all musicians but without my confidence I am a nothing. The new teacher didn't suit very well. For some reason we didn't get along very well. I felt like my playing was getting worse not better. And I wasn't getting the help, with encouragement, that I need. I couldn't make myself not take lessons next semester, it didn't seem fair to not sign up for lessons.
I had been praying for about a month asking God what I should do, what do I do next semester, but I didn't have an answer...
So, after much anxiety I went in Tuesday morning for my jury; playing before a panel of music professors who judge your progress since last semester, it's part of your grade. Anyway I was playing something VERY simple. But I played it terribly, and I'm not just saying that, it was terrible. When I left I was very distraught and wanted to cry. I went to work and decided that I was done, I wasn't going to take lessons at the U next semester. I still wanted to cry, but I felt a little better. I finally had a chance to call mom and tell her what I had decided. She told me that she agreed with me and what God had been telling her about the situation. After I hung up with her I felt much, much better. I felt confident in my decision and that I had done the right thing.
Now, a little rabbit trail :) I had been listening to Timeless Treasures 2. Listening to the work I had done on it and wondering why I couldn't play like that anymore, what was wrong with me. It was a little hard to listen to, knowing I didn't sound like that anymore... now, mind you it's not perfect, nor was it easy to do, ask Dave, 100 and some takes on one song.... but it was possibly the best I've done and it was to God.
So, I went over to Mom and Dad's that evening for my hug :) I was telling Mom about my confidence and how it was gone and I needed it back. It's the one thing that I missed the most. And then she told me something that made a huge difference. She says that "the gifts and callings of God are without repentance". God doesn't take away a gift. And I realized that I had been scared, worried that it was gone, never to return. That maybe I had been brushed aside, not needed anymore. That God was done with my gift or just decided he didn't need it, and my ability to play was gone. But that's not true, it's still there, waiting for God's to use it. I just need to make it ready. It won't be easy, getting back the confidence I lost and once again having the ability to play, really play again. I miss it, I wasn't perfect, and I won't ever be perfect in my music. But as long as I am a ready and willing vessel God will use me, and the gift that he gave me is His to use as he sees fit.
So, with all that said, I just wanted to share the peace that God gave me and the story behind it. Hopefully now that I don't have all that on my mind, I'll have more time to post :)
For those of you who are wondering, yes I will still be doing orchestra at the U, I am also taking a conducting course, and possibly playing viola in a quartet, no I don't know how to play viola that's part of the fun of it :) As for lessons there is a lady that I took lessons from about 8 years ago and again this summer that said she would teach me again, at the expensive of her little time to herself. So, I am going to give her a call after the holidays and everything should be good again :)
It if you got through all that and understand what I was saying "bravo to you!"
What's new in my life
Sorry everyone..... I'm been thinking lately, I've been reading various posts of what's going on in people lives, what new thing they've done or are doing. Something exciting. Something just plain different. Moving, new job, new whatevers.... And I've come to realize, I'm in a rut. A deep rut that keeps running in the same direction with no end in sight. *sigh* What do I do? I'm not dissatisfied with my life, I wouldn't have chosen, I would have made a mess of it. But now what do I do? What's next? What about my "degree" a.k.a the piece-of-paper-I-need-to-prove-I'm-competent. The meeting this morning was about Turning Your Eyes Upon Jesus. O.k. so now what. God's been speaking to me lately about spending more time with Him. And I know I need too. I just hope the "things of earth grow strangely dim" quickly....
Some recent thoughts....
I sit here and think about the fact that I so often tell myself that
Of course I could easily dismiss it as just a step up in the battle. A spiritual war is raging and it gets hotter every day. Dismiss it and go back to doing what God requires of me naturally on a day to day basis. But what about the spiritual requirements? If the battle step up every day, why don't I step it up every day. I can't stay on one level while everything else goes up. Dad just reminded me of Narnia's "Last Battle"
I need to go and do some serious cleaning. Naturally and spiritually. What are my priorities? What I want, or what God desires of me, even if I don't like it. Even if I don't like it. *gulp* yep *swallows* Because if I do it, God's will becomes my will. His desires, my desires. and then when my dreams fade away and He is the dream, I won't be questioning anymore. I won't wonder, worry and stumble around in the dark stubbing my toe on the clutter in my life.
I have a destiny, a purpose, a place in the perfect will of God. Get your priorities straight, clean up and let go of the things in your life that are holding you back and then set your sights on God. Lock your eyes on Him and don't look back. Then your destiny will be fullfilled. And your dreams will not seem unfulfilled and fruitless. They will be God's plan for you and they will be fulfilled and fruitful unto Him.
So....
but alas, my brain comes up a complete ________________________
so... let's see... what have I been doing...
- I finished Joe's uniform in time for the Civil War Day. But I don't think I will get Lydia's skirt done. I feel terrible!!! Bad me, I should stay up all night and finish :)
- I am about ready to throw my hands up in the air and forget this whole music thing all together!!!! It's a good thing I love my students or I would quit! Well,.... that and I know God wants me to play... I actually might be getting a new violin student, which would bring the grand total to 8. This is awesome! I was trying to figure out how to make a little more money. And God just keeps dropping students in my lap, definitely an answer to prayer...
- Don't spent 2 hours in a small bathroom priming wood paneling. It gets VERY hot and tedious!
- When your new violin teacher tells you to practice 4 hours a day. Make sure she actually means it before freaking out! I mean for goodness sake, I have a full time job, 7 students, orchestra, and magazine work on top of life, when I am suppose to practice for 4 hours every day. It's a good thing she didn't mean it...
- Something new I learned! When you shift (on the violin) shift on the half steps its a lot easier.
- Oh and when you are in 2/4 time and counting in 4 a quarter rest gets 2 beats *blushes* I was not quite there in orchestra tonight...
- So, apparently I haven't been doing anything interesting lately.... I slammed my finger between a strawberry bucket and the door to the freezer this afternoon. It fine, it's just a little swollen and I might have a bruise, but it hurt terribly after it happened.
- Oh and I realized that the skin that got
burned on my arm earlier this year is actually a little different in color. You can still tell where the blister was, if you know where to look.. It's not bad at all, but it's there.
- Other than that, my room desperately needs to be cleaned and I am very ticked at my hair... maybe I need a trim... Kristi! will you bring your clippers with you this weekend??
O.k. so I think maybe I will go to bed, I'm being a little random...
So, good night all!
Back to the school grindstone.....
So, I'm back to school next Monday. Definitely for this semester depending on what happens I might not be back for the spring semester. I'm also planning on taking some CLEP tests and working on finish my music degree. Hopefully by correspondence. I'm going to contact a college in NJ and see if they will except my credits from UWP. Then I will go from there. Hopefully it won't take me too long to finish. Until then,... off to the old grindstone....
A weekend with friends
I very blessed to be able to spend this last weekend with friends. Rebecca and I drove down to David and Kristi's on Friday night to spend the weekend with them. You see Joanna, my friend of mine from Colorado, whom I haven't seen in 10 years, is in Chicago the month of August. So I called D&K to see if they wouldn't mind some company and if we could go into Chicago and meet up with Joanna. They said sure and we made a weekend out of it! We went into Chicago on Saturday, picked up Joanna and headed around town. Rebecca and I managed to not get any pictures but Kristi posted some on her blog. We walked all over Chicago, probably 6 miles in all. We saw everything from the beach, to Union Station, to a huge aluminium, steel, whatever it was bean. (We didn't take this picture. I found it online)

After dropping Joanna off we went out to eat at a Greek restaurant in Greektown, Chicago. It was called Artropolis. It not only gave us a chance to dry off but the food was wonderful! Thanks Dave!!!!
This is the only picture Rebecca and I took the whole weekend. 2 wet, and happy friends!
All in all I had a wonderful time. Thank God for friends.
a little announcement
Also, for those of you who I've talked to about my violin teacher (Ruth) who was wonderful. She won't be back at the U this year teaching. She got a music research job and it won't work with her schedule to teach. So... I'm not sure what will be happening.... I'm very unsure about taking lessons from yet another teacher who I don't know... So.... anyway.... I don't know what is happening there. I would appreciate your prayers that I would know what to do in the situation. Oh, and my recital is probably on hold, until we get this all straightened out. Life in regards to music has been quite interesting and trying the last week or so. So, that's what going on, I just thought I would let you all know.
Home Sweet Home
OK, 2 announcements
#1 We are home!!!!
#2 I am a country girl and I LOVE it!
I know without a shadow of a doubt that I do NOT like big cities, nor ever want to live in a big city, they are confusing, ridiculous and totally unpersonal! I would gladly live the rest of my days in a small town. DBQ isn't too big, PV is great. I tell you, being able to turn around when you want, actually knowing where you are going, not being beeped at, and just the peace that goes with living in a small town is totally worth it! I don't care if the shopping is better and there are more opportunities small towns are the way to go!
There, now I will get off my soapbox.
oh, no I haven't forgotten about the beautiful thing I was going to show you all, I just haven't gotten to the picture yet.
Prayers please
I'm just posting quick to ask for prayer. I woke up yesterday and my eyes hurt and where swollen or something. I light hurt them, and for a while anyway I had to fight to keep my eyes open. They got better as the day when on but where red and hurt again this morning. They are definitely better but I would still appreciate prayers. I'm not sure what caused it in the first place. I'm believing that it is not allergies or anything like that.
Thanks!
one word quiz
You.
.Can.
.Only.
.Type.
.One.
.Word.
.Answers.
.Not as easy as you might think.
1. Where is your cell phone?
charging
2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend?
nope
3. Your hair?
brown
4. Your mother?
amazing
5. Your father?
wonderful
6. Your favorite thing?
music
7. Your dream last night?
dream?
8. Your favorite drink?
milk!
9. What?
ever
10. The room you're in?
dark (Susie is sleeping...)
11. Your ex?
who?
12. Your fears?
stuck
13. What do you want to be in 10 years?
married
14. Who did you hang out with last night?
myself
15. What you're not?
sleeping
16. Muffins?
yummy
17. One of your wish list items?
bow
18. Where did you grow up?
here-n-there
19. The last thing you did?
Pagemaker
20. What are you wearing?
Pj's
21. Your TV?
silent
22. Your pet?
none
23. Your computer?
necessary
24. Your life?
interesting
25. Your mood?
lonely
26. Missing?
Mr. Me
27. What are you thinking about right now?
sleep
29. Your work?
trying
30. Your summer?
busy
31. Your relationship status?
single
32. Your favorite color?
yellow
33. When is the last time you laughed?
today
34. Last time you cried?
*shrug*
35. School?
sometimes
emotions...
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About Me
- Katie
- I am a daughter of God who is striving to do and be all that God has for me. I'm a pretty normal person, kinda goofy at times, but I can be a dear. If I try :) I always try to be happy and I'm never lazy, I've tried, it doesn't agree with me. Once you meet me you'll never want for entertainment :)


